If you would've asked me 4 or 5 years ago what I wanted to do, I had this really elaborate plan set up in my head that was drilled into me my whole life. It wen't a little something like this: "I wanna go to college, get my masters, go to law school, become a lawyer, and open up my firm firm to help out my family."
In reality, I had no idea what the hell I was saying. No one in my family had been to college before, I didn't even know what lawyers really did. Hell I barely knew anything about the law. It was all just a scapegoat really, because I didn't know what I could do that could make my family happy & myself happy. Being a lawyer never sounded horrible, it just never called to me. But many things don't. Rarely do I feel extremely passionate about something.
But crazy thing is now, I'm a college graduate, and I'm in my first year of law school...I honestly never thought, that I'd be in law school. You ask anyone around me, I'd probably be the last person you'd expect to be in law school lol. It just seems so ridiculous to me when I step back and look at my life. I never set my expectation this high...my parents definitely did, but me? never. I have this mental limit on myself. I know I'm not an over achiever, but I can get things done.
I can't remember what pushed me so hard to do this, but I've lost that really strong desire I had this time last year to excel. Maybe its the stress from school, I dunno, but I'm hoping to find it again. I've probably written about it somewhere in these blog posts, which I plan on reading over again, since I'm procrastinating right now -___- lol
My last update was my birthday, I swear I though I did another post after that....probably something I ended up deleting lol
But Law School is pretty much what everyone and thier mothers told me it was gonna be like. "read read read read read & read more". I read soooooooo much. My case books are basically extensions of my body at this point, its about 200 pgs a week....smh and then the briefing of each case is a nightmare...my god..But I can do it...I did pretty well on my mid terms, which I think is what shot down my motivation...I need to really humble down myself some more and get back to the grind. It's not even like the work is hard...its just so much of it, it almost becomes unbearable...lol
But yeah...just felt like my blog needed an update. Long story short. I'm in Law School now and I have no clue what I'm doing, but I'm pretty sure I'm on the same boat as the other 1L's as well lol.
& 2 more things. I don't sleep anymore, and coffee has become a staple in my diet even though I still think it tastes like garbage lol.
-Till next time my neglected blog
oh & a pic since this was originally a photoblog haha, dunno what I'd do without these guys =]